My Sick, Twisted, Undying Love
by Aaron D
Summary: Mona's really sweet on her main man, but when Wario finally goes too far, will she dump the burly Polish plumber(treasure hunter)software designer for good? (From WarioWare, Inc.)


  


My Sick, Twisted, Undying Love 

by Aaron D. Roberts

* * *

Mona woke up about twenty minutes late. 

This was highly unusual, as the young redhead would generally punch the "snooze" button around fifty or so times before finally rolling out of bed and realizing she was desperately late for her job, or for school, or whatever might be the case on that particular day. Amazed, Mona slipped on her helmet and strapped on her goggles, pumping her elbows in time with the vibrant 80's music streaming out of the clock radio. 

"_Some boys take a beautiful girl,_" Mona sang in unison with her appliance, "_And hide her from the rest of the world!_" 

She tossed on her light trenchcoat, swinging her hips in the rhythm. "_I want to be the one to walk in the sun---oh, girls, they want to have fu-unn..._" 

After making sure her red hair was properly primped, Mona hopped onto her Mo-Ped (which was nice but nowhere NEAR as cool as Wario's bike), and zipped away towards work, which, since she was driving the distance at a reasonably sane pace, attracted no adverse attention from the officers of the law, which had occurred on more than one occasion in the past. 

At this relaxed speed, Mona found that she could more easily observe the details of Diamond City as she drove by, rather than merely focusing on avoiding the coppers and any speed bumps as she usually did. Technically, the commute from the suburban outskirts of town should have taken around twenty minutes, but as one might expect, Mona's average time was around seven. Still, she drove at least slightly slower than usual, and could watch as the pier, the grocery store, and other landmarks came into view. Dribble's taxi depot was clearly visible on her left, and the towering azure dome of WarioWare, Incorporated could be seen lording its magnificence over Diamond City's relatively mild urban sprawl. 

Mona sighed as she went by this last, her head filled with thoughts of the tower's occupant. Still, eventually her mind would have to get back to business, and as she pulled into the Cafe Gelato's side lot, she began focusing on the day's work at hand. 

Admittedly, serving her customers ice cream, coffee, and other assorted foodstuffs could have been far worse---most of the customers were her friends and business partners, after all---but there was a reason working a job was called "work" and not "happy fun play time." Mona hopped off of the Mo-Ped, letting it coast into its traditional parking spot, and pulled out her keys. This was the first time in several months she'd actually had to open the restaurant...actually, _had_ she ever done it before? Maybe not. 

The lock clicked grudgingly as Mona turned her key clockwise. She pulled open the glass door, turned the "Closed" sign to "Open," and began to prepare the morning's standard foodstuffs, remembering to clock in as she did so. "Seven fifty-six," she murmured, gazing at the time printed on her punch card. "That may be the earliest I've ever shown up." She took off her street clothes and donned her uniform, smoothing her hair out before she assumed her duties. 

The coffee was already percolating when Mona's supervisor arrived. 

Joe whistled as he unlocked the door unnecessarily, never considering for a moment that Mona might already have been present. He cycled the lock four times, no doubt due to some nervous habit, then walked into the cafe, whistling still. "Oh, what a glorious day...eeee----yaaah!!" The middle-aged proprietor's jowls flew upward as he beheld the cheerful Mona, polishing down the lunch counter as the coffee finished brewing. 

"Good morning, Joe!" Mona wished him perkily. 

Joe jumped. "Mona! What's going on here? Did I forget to set my clock back an hour?" 

"No," said Mona, "I actually woke up this morning. Can you believe it?" 

"Hm," Joe said thoughtfully, "actually I can't. Do you mean you didn't stay up until three AM this morning designing more of your little video games?" 

Mona laughed with a flutter. "No, I did, but I still managed to wake up today. Isn't that the coolest?" 

Joe mumbled something below his breath as he began preparing the traditional breakfast fare. A couple dozen eggs, a pound of bacon, and some wheat bread were usually all he needed---after all, they only served short orders. 

Except, Mona amended, when a certain special person would come in. 

She shook her head. _That_ particular patron wouldn't be here for a little bit, though, now, would he? She sighed, and poured a mug full of coffee just as the door opened. 

"Coffee, Mona!" The bulky Dribble ordered in his gruff voice, the bell on the door dinging nonchalantly as it closed upon the next entrant. 

"Hey, watch it!" Spitz said as he came in, rubbing his round pink nose. The smaller taxi driver clambered up onto one of the stools, which, since they were nearly twice his height, took a great deal of effort to climb onto. 

Dribble, meanwhile, sat down with ease at the adjacent stool. "Just dry toast for me, today." 

Mona nodded, which she called Dribble's "eternal breakfast." "The usual for you, too, Spitz?" The smaller cabbie generally preferred two eggs, over medium, plus four sausage links for his breakfast. 

"No way," said Spitz in his squeaky voice. "I want 'em scrambled, today." 

"Sure," said Mona, edging around the ice cream freezer and pulling out two plates for her friends. Joe loaded up the plates with the aforementioned orders, which Mona quickly delivered to her customers. 

"All right!" Spitz said as he dug in with aplomb. Dribble, however, merely looked at his toast and began sipping his coffee slowly. The two were already done with their morning taxi rounds, and were taking a break before returning to the job. They had been consistently coming in at this time for as long as Mona could remember. 

No other customers had yet come in, so Mona had some down time. "Hey, so, like, I came up with some really cool games last night." 

Spitz remained focused on his breakfast, but Dribble grunted with mild interest. "Yeah? Are we still doing that?" 

"Sure, we are!" Mona affirmed. "Wario never told us to quit, did he?" 

"Well, I guess not, but---" 

"_Anyway_," Mona said forcefully, "I came up with about six, but these two are my favorites---check them out!" She started sketching on the counter with Dribble's fork, which he wasn't using anyway. "Okay, so in the first, you're trying to vacuum up a snake, okay, except it's hard to vacuum up, so you've got to press the A button really fast!" 

"Why would you want to vacuum up a snake?" asked Spitz between mouthfuls. 

"Er, yeah," said Dribble, scratching his head. "Plus, isn't that a little...inhumane?" 

"Shut up!" Mona ordered them. "This game's great! You just can't appreciate my mastery of design." She smoothed her hair back a bit, as it had become somewhat unruly in her cute little outburst. "Anyway, my second favorite is a lot simpler: help an ear mite burrow into a person's ear!" She sketched a rough outline with the fork. "Cool, huh?" 

Dribble scratched his ear reflexively. "Growf! Umm, I'm not that fond of ear mites, Mona..." 

"Yeah!" said Spitz, twittering as he shoved more bacon into his mouth. His next words were a little muffled. "One time Dribble had to---ooof!" 

Removing his elbow from his partner's stomach, Dribble said to Mona, "You know, I've been reading a really good sci-fi book by John Barnes. It's called 'The Sky So Big and Black,' and it's about people living on Mars. I was thinking of trying to make up a good game for it, but so far I've got nothing." 

Mona eyed the big cab driver suspiciously. "Trying to change the subject, eh? Well, I know Wario's gonna think my new games just _rock_, so there." 

"So what?" said Spitz before gulping down a mouthful of scalding hot coffee. "Yeeee-aahhh!" Trying to cool his burned mouth with the breeze from his flapping hand, he added, "We've got games, too, you know!" 

Rolling her eyes, Mona topped off the two taxi driver's cups. "Really?" she asked, setting the pot back onto the warmer. "Like what?" 

Spitz looked flustered. "Well, umm, we..." 

Fortunately, the small, furry cabbie did not have to come up with an immediate answer, as the door opened once again, the bell's incessant ringing alerting the cafe. "Good morning, all!" called out the yellow-clad newcomer. 

"'Sup, Crygor," said Dribble, without looking up from his coffee cup. 

Dr. Crygor, Diamond City's resident mad scientist, plopped himself down in the stool on the far end of the counter, the one nearest the entrance. "It's a pleasure to see everyone this morning," he said. Crygor's expression was always hard to read, as his dark visor hid his eyes completely from any observers. Still, the doctor looked as pleased as one might expect him to be on any given morning. 

"What'll you have, Doctor?" Mona asked. 

Crygor made a big show of indecision, then quickly answered, "I think I'll have the bubblegum today." Then, nodding as if in agreement with himself, he leaned forward on the counter. 

Mona shrugged, and got the whacked-out physician (at least, she _thought_ he was a physician) his breakfast. Dr. Crygor always had to be a little different. Aside from constantly wearing clothes that looked like pajamas, he also consistently ordered ice cream for breakfast, which was clearly contrary to most dietary recommendations. However, it was not her job to critique her customer's orders, so Mona merely opened up the freezer, loaded up a cone with three scoops of the turquoise-colored bubblegum ice cream, and handed the concoction to Crygor, who was already rubbing his hands in anticipation. 

She watched as the doctor gobbled down his first scoop, then cautiously wiped his mustachioed mouth off with a paper napkin. "Excellent," Crygor said, sighing in satisfaction. 

"You didn't swallow the gum, did you?" 

Crygor coughed violently, doubling over, then re-straightened himself. "Now I have." 

Mona stepped carefully away, trying to find herself something else to do. Dr. Crygor tended to give her the shivers, and it wasn't from the chilly nature of the ice cream freezer (which in fact tended to put a pleasant rosiness in her cheeks). Unfortunately, no other customers seemed to be forthcoming, Mona busied herself with cleaning up after Joe, who probably did not need much help, anyway. Still, it made her appear busy, and thus, she was able to avoid any further forced conversation with the short genius. 

She kept herself busy for about another half-hour, until the door chime rang out once again. Sure of who the cafe's next patron was, Mona danced to her left, leaning forward to catch a glimpse of his ruggedly handsome countenance. "Morning, Wario!" she called cheerfully as the intrepid adventurer walked jauntily into the restaurant. 

Wario grunted wordlessly and slammed himself into the center stool, which creaked under his massive manly bulk. Leaning his well-muscled forearms onto the counter, he flashed his teeth in a characteristic grin. "Let's see....what does Wario want for breakfast today?" He scratched his wonderfully cleft chin, then snapped his fingers. "I've got it! Baked garlic, garlic mashed potatoes, and sliced eel!" As if to congratulate himself on a job well done, Wario spun around three times clockwise on his stool. 

Joe, who had already correctly anticipated that garlic would be present in the meal in some form, had already covered two ears of the fragrant herb with butter and tossed them into the oven. Meanwhile, he pulled a long unagi out of the freezer and began chopping it up. Needless to say, the cafe's menu had been altered considerably to accommodate Wario's unique tastes. 

"'Sup, Wario," greeted Dribble, once again keeping his eyes fixed upon his cup of joe. 

"Yes, what is up, indeed?" Wario repeated interrogatively. "Wario's profit margins are what is up! Or, at least, they should be soon!" 

"Whatever that means," muttered Crygor. 

Mona flashed the doctor a dirty look and placed herself resolutely in Wario's line of vision, leaning her elbows on the counter top and resting her chin on both fists. "You know, Wario," she said, looking deep into the former plumber's adorable, beady little eyes, "I came up with a few new games for WarioWare last night." 

Wario cackled and cracked his knuckles. "Excellent!" 

Mona's eyes brightened. "Yeah, they're just awesome. The first one is _really_ cool. What you have to do is---" 

"Hey, Mona," called Dribble from the far side of the cafe. "Could use some more coffee." 

Eminently annoyed, Mona stomped away from the object of her attentions and violently snatched up the coffee pot, nearly splashing some of the hot brew on her own immaculate uniform. Fortunately, she twisted out of the way and the dark, dank liquid merely splashed on the floor. She made a mental note to wipe the spill up later, then forced herself to gently pour coffee into Dribble's mug---it would never do to splash scorchingly hot liquid onto one of her customer, after all. Still, she kept her eyes fixed on Wario the entire time, and when Spitz mildly asked for a refill, she sighed, and tapped her foot as she repeated the process over again for the shorter cabbie. 

"Anything else?" she asked, almost rhetorically, as she immediately dropped the coffee pot back onto its warmer and strode back to where Wario had now received his pungent meal. After staring at Wario for a bit more, Mona discovered her ears had gotten quite warm, but could not tell exactly why that was. Had she remained for a couple more minutes in her previous position, she might have discovered why. 

Crygor watched sullenly as Mona devoted her consciousness solely to Wario. "Hm," the doctor snorted. "Don't you think her fixation on him is a little...creepy?" 

"Yeah," said Spitz. 

Dribble growled good-naturedly. "Yeah. It'd be a lot _less_ creepy for Mona to be sweet on a middle-aged wacko science geek, right?" After taking a sip of his beverage, he added, "Or a dog-faced cab driver." 

Spitz started twittering so hard with laughter he nearly fell out of his seat. 

Fortunately, the girl in question heard none of this, as she was concentrating on a singular focus point, that being the brawny yet bulky motorcyclist who also served as CEO of WarioWare, Incorporated. Unluckily for Mona, however, Wario's food arrived mere seconds after she was once more free to adore him. Joe slid the garlicky platter in front of his customer, then quickly moved away, holding his overly sensitive nostrils. Wario started shoveling the mashed potatoes into his mouth as quickly as possible, with some globs of the mushy substance missing the target entirely, splattering over the counter, the floor, and one stray speck landed on Mona's apron, though she hardly noticed. 

Once his potatoes were completely devoured, Wario started in on the ears of garlic, the tops of which had been lopped off by Joe's meat cleaver. He scooped each clove out with a spoon, chomping on them gleefully. After finishing the second part of his repast, Wario paused for a brief instant, then belched victoriously. 

Seizing her opportunity, Mona quickly said, "So, Wario, about my new games---" 

But she was too late. Wario immediately began snarfing down his barbecued eel, tearing and chewing with a menagerie of sounds that would probably have been unbelievable to those who were not acquainted with him. This horrific feast lasted perhaps a bit longer than the previous portions of the meal, and it was no less visually unpleasant, except perhaps to Mona, whose perceptions in this case could not be trusted in any event. 

Wario gulped down the last bite and sighed in satisfaction. Mona was eager to try another attempt at conversation, but the vest-clad treasure hunter abruptly stood up, patted his stomach, and once again, shouted, "Excellent!" Then, he proudly strode out of the diner without another word. 

"Hey, Wario!" Mona called to him. "Don't forget, we're going to get ice cream together, later!" Mona was fairly confident of their later appointment, even without any positive reinforcement, or indeed, without any confirmation of the date whatsoever. She sighed dreamily, and, realizing that once again, Wario had forgotten to pay for his meal, she took seventeen koopabits out of her pocket and used them to cover the cost of Wario's breakfast. No wonder she never kept any of the money she made. Between paying for Wario's meals and two or three nights a week partying at Club Sugar, she was lucky to be breaking even. 

Well, the highlight of her morning was over, but she had other things to look forward to, didn't she? Mona hummed as she bussed Wario's devastated eating area, grabbing a wet rag from behind the counter and scooping up the bits of potato, garlic, and eel that littered the landscape. 

Meanwhile, Dribble slammed down his cup of coffee. "Well, back to work. See ya later, Mona, everybody." The large taxi driver hauled his partner bodily out of the cafe, waving good-bye with his free hand. 

Dr. Crygor was silent for a few seconds, then blew what had to have been the biggest bubble Mona had ever seen. The doctor mumbled something, then floated out the door, suspended by the big pink orb, and back towards his lab, presumably. 

Aside from cleaning the remnants of Wario's voracious eating and her earlier coffee spills, Mona experienced a fairly laid-back day at work. In fact, almost nothing of note occurred until just after noon, when one of the most petite of Mona's friends entered the diner. In fact, she didn't even quite see him at first. 

"Double-scoop. Vanilla, please." 

"What?" Mona looked around. "Is someone there?" 

"It's me, Mona," the squeaky voice said as a small, spectacled boy in a yellow helmet pulled himself onto a handy stool (in fact, it was the same one upon which Wario's studly bulk had rested mere hours before). 

"Hi, there, 9-Volt," Mona said pleasantly. "I should have known it was you---you only order vanilla like, EVERY time." 

The small boy shrugged and pulled out his red monochromatic Game Boy. "I like variety in my games, not my ice cream." 9-Volt started tapping the buttons in what seemed like a random order to Mona, but was no doubt in a swift and strategic fashion. 

"What're you playing today?" Mona asked as she took the ice cream scoop out of its hot-water-home. 

"Tetris," 9-Volt answered absently, without taking his gaze from the screen. "It was invented in Russia, you know." 

"Mmm-hmm," she murmured, packing the vanilla ice cream tightly into the waffle cone. Mona always made sure there was plenty of good stuff in there for her friends. 

9-Volt took the small sound as encouragement to continue, so he did. "Yeah. Turns out that Alexei Pazhitnov, the guy who designed the game, had licensed it out for American home computer but not CONSOLE rights, so Minoru Arakawa and Howard Lincoln, the two guys in charge of Nintendo of America at the time, flew out to Moscow to lock up rights for the Game Boy. Turned out, though, that they ended up getting a license for the NES as well---oh, thanks." This last as Mona handed him the ice cream. 9-Volt tried to find some way of playing Tetris with one hand, but failed, so he put down the Game Boy momentarily and continued his tale after gorging on a huge mouthful of ice cream. "Anyway, like I was saying... 

Mona tuned out the endless stream of droning talk, as she tended to do during 9-Volt's long-winded tales of video game history. Her traditionally short attention span was part of the reason Wario valued her so as a game designer, after all. Ah, Wario. Thinking about him always set Mona's heart a-flutter, and this time was no exception. She couldn't wait to get off work so she could head over to WarioWare Inc's headquarters, the better to show Wario her latest designs. What would Wario be doing right now? He'd probably already had his lunch, so that meant he was probably lifting weights, doing his after-lunch workout. Admittedly, Wario's somewhat rotund physique was less than perfect, but her mustachioed macho man was so spectacularly strong, it was easy to get around that. 

"...so, Bullet-Proof Software was the company that had brought Tetris to Japan," 9-Volt was continuing, "and they offered to pay..." 

Mona sighed inwardly and continued her daydreaming. Maybe she could take Wario for a walk through the park after work? That would be boring. He was _way_ too cool for that. What about a movie? That would be all right, but she couldn't really see Wario's studly bod when all the lights were out, and he'd only want to pay attention to the picture, anyway. Sometimes, it was hard figuring out what exactly to do when she was with Wario, but to be honest, Mona would have been perfectly happy just gazing at the hunkaliciousness of his face, but she knew her main man would get bored quickly. 

"...how about that coffee?" Jimmy was asking. 

Mona started. "Huh?" When had Jimmy gotten here? 

Jimmy had been waving his hand frantically, but stopped once he had broken Mona's reverie. "Cup of coffee, please," he ordered in his low, suave voice, seemingly none the worse for having to wait. 

"She always does that when I tell a story," said 9-Volt, who had finished his ice cream cone and returned to his game. "I could use an iced tea or something, too, Mona." 

"Yo, shouldn't you be in school today, man?" Jimmy asked 9-Volt as Mona worked to grab their beverages. Jimmy never came in before noon; since he spent all night, every night boogie-ing down in Club Sugar, this was unsurprising. He was wearing his blue afro wig today. Some of Diamond City's most eligible ladies fell for the handsome Jimmy, only to be devastated when they found that he would never dance with _just one woman_. His love of the dance was universal, and far greater than his loyalty to any person. So Jimmy had told her one time. 

Mona never really saw what the big fuss was about. She basically thought that the afro wigs were kind of goofy, and even if she hadn't, she had another man to occupy her thoughts with (although that particular man could get kind of _frustrating_ at times! But, what a wonderful kind of frustration!). 

"School got out early today," said 9-Volt as Mona sat his beverage in front of him. "Some kind of accident or something." After a few seconds of silence, he added off-handedly, "Did you know that if you freeze a can of shaving cream, then use a can opener to take off the bottom, it'll explode once it thaws? And did you further know that a whole bunch of exploded shaving cream can really gum up a school's ventilation system?" 

Mona shook her head indulgently, but Jimmy started laughing softly, then held out his open palm. "Put 'er there, man." 9-Volt obediently slapped him five. 

The youth returned to his game play. "Where was I? Oh, yeah. So after the deal was done, Arakawa, Lincoln, and Pazhitnov were all celebrating by eating sushi, and Pazhitnov accidentally put the entire portion of wasabi in his mouth!" 

"That's awesome," Mona said quickly, trying to forestall another lengthy exposition. "Play any new games lately?" 

"Oh, yeah!" 9-Volt said quickly, eagerly changing tracks in conversation. "Wario just picked up a few for me last week." 

"That's cool," Mona said, then caught something odd about 9-Volt's statement. "Wait a second. Did you say that _Wario_ bought you some new games?" That sounded nothing like him. Wario, while muscular, was not possessed of any traits resembling generosity. 

"Sure," said 9-Volt. "He was going to pay me five hundred koopabits for my weekly salary, but I told him he could just get me three Game Paks a week instead. He said that was okay with him, 'cause that way, he doesn't have to pay Social Security or Medicare." 

Jimmy nodded with a knowing grin. "That Wario, always trying to save a buck. I told him it'd be cash only, for me." 

Mona was a bit befuddled. "Wait. Are you telling me you each get a weekly paycheck from Wario?" 

The two nodded. "Sure," Jimmy said. "For WarioWare." 

"I thought we were just getting a percentage of the profits." 

"We are," said 9-Volt, "but we're getting paid a salary, too, for our game designs." 

Mona stamped her foot in an adorable gesture of grumpiness. "He didn't even bring that up! Is everyone getting paid but me?" No. Wario could never take advantage of her feelings that way, could he? Okay, maybe. This was starting to feel as bad as the time Wario had tried to steal all the company's revenue (although, by this point, Mona had convinced herself that the whole fiasco was all just some sort of horrible misunderstanding). 

Jimmy nonchalantly tossed his coffee mug onto the counter. "I don't know. He told us not to talk about it." 

"Yeah," 9-Volt agreed. 

Mona's lips sort of smooshed together in a precious little pout. "There is no way I'm letting him get away with this!" 

Hours later, Mona, finished with her shift, was riding on her Mo-Ped, chatting with a certain other member of WarioWare, Inc. on her cell phone. "Are you sure?" 

"ooooOOOOOOOOoooooEEEEEEE." 

"So, getting a weekly salary never came up?" 

"EEEEEeeeeeeeEEEEEoooooo." 

Mona nodded, even though the being at the other end of the phone could not possibly have seen it. Then again, maybe he could have, with those seven other senses he had. "Thanks, Orbulon. And don't worry---I'm going to get this taken care of." The breeze blew swiftly by her resolute face as Diamond City's most distinctive of residences loomed in front of her. Mentally, she checked off the list in her mind: 

Jimmy, Crygor, 9-Volt, and Kat were getting paid a weekly salary of some sort by Wario, although 9-Volt and Kat were receiving Game Paks and candy, respectively, in lieu of actual money. Meanwhile, Dribble, Spitz, Orbulon, Ana, and herself were getting nothing, nada, zip. 

"Wario," Mona said softly, as he was not there to hear her, anyway, "this won't end well." 

She arrived at the tower just as the afternoon sun was beginning to set. The door was locked, almost as if Wario had been anticipating her angry arrival, though this could not have been the case. Mona pounded on the portal a few times, then ripped the door off its hinges in pure frustration. Fortunately for her, Wario had always been simply too miserly to purchase a solid door or locks. She pounded up the circular stairs, saving the boiling point of her fury for when she finally faced the fickle president of WarioWare. 

"Ah, Mona!" Wario cackled as she stormed into the top of the tower. "Come to discuss your new games! Excellent!" 

"Not so fast, you greedy punk!" Mona shouted. "I heard about you paying some of the others!" 

For the first time since she'd known him, Wario looked a little taken aback. "Err, you did?" 

"Yes!" Mona said, her vision nearly as red as her hair. "I know about how you're cheating every one of us that you thought could be easily cheated, you cheat!" 

"So, what?!" Wario countered. "I'm in charge, here! I'll decide who gets paid, and how much!" 

Mona stared at him icily. "I don't believe I heard you correctly." 

Wario backed down from her furious...fury. "It's not...that simple. You know how many startup costs we had, um, I just don't have enough money to pay everyone." Unfortuitiously for Wario, however, it was at this exact moment that he knocked into his haphazardly-locked portable safe (once again, a result of bargain-basement prices). The door popped open, and oodles of gold coins and green bills burst forth. "Um, that's the 401K fund," Wario said lamely. 

Mona kept ominously silent, her blue eyes staring laser beams into Wario's flustered face. 

Wario blinked twice, then backed up again, then finally capitulated. "Ohhh, all right! I'll start paying _everybody_! Two hund---" 

"Five," Mona corrected. 

"---_five_ hundred koopabits a week. You happy now?!" 

Mona's face broke out in an infectiously cute grin. "You bet!" She glomped her cuddly, corpulent CEO in a huge hug. "Was that really so hard?" 

Wario's white teeth showed in a grisly grimace. "You have no idea." 

She kissed the powerfully-built plumber just under his mustache. "Let's go get that ice cream, huh? And, don't worry; I'll pay." 

Wario's face brightened immensely at this. "Excellent!" he cried, pumping his manly fists into the air.

* * *

FIN 


End file.
